Home Again, Home Again, Tra La La...

I've been putting off writing this "first" post. Since my last post, we've had a baby (she's awesome), had a six month home leave in Montreal (it was amazing), and survived the trek back to Cambodia, this time with 2 kids in tow (we survived!)

Keeping it all together with a family of four, sort of
Photo cred: OllieMateo

I want to chat about our home leave; I'll do that later.

I want to brag about my new daughter, though I do enough of that on Facebook ;)

I want to put into a few easy-to-read sentences the complex emotions we are all going through being back in Cambodia. I don't know if it's possible. But I'll give it a try. In point form, because then I can at least pretend my feelings can be easily categorised and dealt with.

1. So happy! Reunions with friends and Phnom Penh family have been so joyful. Meals, pool time, play dates, events, coffee dates, catch-ups, home group meetings, it has all been so lovely.
2. At peace. We feel like Cambodia is still where we're meant to be for now. Walking into our apartment after 30 hours in transit felt very normal and peaceful, it was definitely coming home.
3. Thankful. Spending 7 months at home, and fitting so easily into our family, friend, and church groups during that time, was soul-feeding. Blessed doesn't begin to cover it.
4. Refreshed. I felt like we were constantly poured into by "our people" over those months. People loved us so well! Our time in Canada was relaxing and rejuvenating, and we're ready dive back into life in Cambodia.
5. Homesick. I've decided that it actually gets harder and harder to be away from loved ones. My heart feels torn in two and is constantly aching in the background of life.
6. Excited. So many new challenges ahead and Charlie and I are both ready to jump in! I am heading more towards work in economic resilience and Charlie is shaping his role at Chab Dai in new and exciting ways. More to come on that ;)
7. Anxious. With new challenges come new anxieties! Not just over work, but also wanting to make sure the girls are secure and well. My motherly anxiety is something I am always praying over and working at.
8. [The emotion of wanting to carry all your kids' burdens.] Is there a word for that yet? For the first time, Sam has been able to verbalise her sadness over leaving people behind, and we are trying to coach her through it, but sometimes I just want to take it all on myself so she doesn't have to feel the sadness.

So if you're wondering how I'm doing, I'm usually a combination of many of these. Which is why, if you ask me, "How are you doing?" I'll probably respond with, "Umm, yeah, pretty well."

Happy New Year!!

And just like that, it's 2015!

It's going to be a big year for us. Half in Canada, half in Cambodia. Doubling the number of children we have (yikes!) Thinking through our roles and how to live out our calling when we return to Cambodia later this year.

For now, it's just the waiting game. Squeege may come any day now, or may take their sweet time and bake for an extra week or two! Hopefully, we'll have some exciting news within a week or so ;)

Sam is so excited to be a big sister!

It's a little amazing how "normal" it has felt to be home. We've settled in really well, we're in our own little place now and it's cosy and wonderful. I don't really miss Cambodia yet, although I do miss our community there. Knowing we're going back is a great feeling, and yet I'm so happy to be able to spend a few months in Montreal. 

For now, I'm content living in the moment and preparing myself for this second precious whirlwind about to enter our lives!

4 signs my TCK may not completely fit in in Canada

Sam has lived in Cambodia since she was 9 months old, everything she remembers is here. In preparing to go home for half a year, I've been noticing some things about her that may seem strange to Canadians and may get us and her labelled "eccentric."

The only modes of transportation she knows are motos and tuktuks. In fact, one of her current ambitions is to drive a tuktuk "when she is older." I'm thinking getting her into a car seat may prove a tad difficult.

On a recent excursion to Silk Island, Sam got to "drive" the tuktuk, sitting in
front of the driver as he slowly made his way down the dirt road as we walked beside.

She takes off her shoes whenever she enters an indoor space. Because that's what you do. Even at the Chab Dai office, everyone walks around barefoot, and there is are shelves of shoes outside. The other day we went into the supermarket, where one leaves one's shoes on, of course, and she sat by the door and took off her shoes and left them there! I can just imagine her doing that with her winter boots and socks when we go to IGA or Costco back in Montreal!

Our new boots, ready to be winter worn!

"Cold" for Sam is when the air con is on. Wearing socks is only for when we go to Monkey Business (kids play gym) where socks are required. And she wants to wear a sweater on mornings when there is a warm breeze floating across the balcony.

Earlier this year, we went to Sri Lanka and hiked to World's End. It was
bright, sunny, and 15 degrees Celsius, and we were freezing!!

She has picked up a few, umm, interesting habits as a TCK in Cambodia. She has an adorable and strange accent when she says certain words and phrases (sometimes a Khmer accent, sometimes a French accent). And some less charming habits. We were sitting in the Russian Market the other day enjoying a mid-errand lime juice when my darling toddler actually "hawked a loogie" and spit it on the floor of the market! Straight faced, completely nonchalant, leaving Charlie and I to stare in shock at what had just transpired. I am crossing my fingers and hoping she does not do something like that back home!

So if you see her doing something strange or unusual in Canada, just chalk it up to growing up in Cambodia! (And not at all to her weird parents, ok?!)